im dying i just looked up press f to pay respects bc i realized i didnt even know where it was from i just picked it up from everyone and it turns out its a fucking actual quick time event from some call of duty game. you have to literally press F to pay respects at a funeral fsdjfkljsdf i really just thought it was something from some MMO or something
elections will come and go all around the world but jeb memes will never die
jeb memes will never stop being funny and you can catch me in 2086 losing my shit over an image of jeb winning a landslide victory as the president of mars
character A slowly falls in love with character B over the course of several years, realization hits them that they’ve been in love with B for a long time hits them like a truck
cool badass is actually a giant fucking nerd
The Power of Friendship ™
flat “what” reactions
sweet adorable characters with horrible tragic pasts
villains-turned-heroes becoming the Weird Uncle
characters that aren’t actually related having a parent-child relationship
characters that aren’t actually siblings having a sibling-like bond
“I can’t stand this person but I would die for them”
you will take these tropes from my cold dead hands.
If your fic is 1000 words long, you can’t tag it slow burn. It’s not slow burn. That is a matchstick. And this is my personal bias here but if those motherfuckers you’re writing experience significant forward momentum in their relationship in under 5k words, then that is just a regular old burn. Slow burn should be borderline intolerable and a mistake to start reading at 2 in the morning.
If the fic doesn’t have multiple scenes where two people almost kiss but then don’t because of a contrived interruption that they are both grateful for and angry about, until the desperate reader is forced every other paragraph to mutter, “this is fucking ridiculous, this is bullshit, I’m so fucking mad, please update sooooooooooon,” then it isn’t a slow burn. It is a romance and that is a lovely thing but. Slow burns should feel like being set on fire unto your death but the tinder is people not kissing and the spark is people who don’t admit they love each other and the whole thing is. You know. Slow.
CORRECT
I once read a slow burn where the main pairing didn’t even speak to each other ontil 80k words in
This is the funniest fucking thing I’ve ever read and the only true slow burn fic