Tag: punny

spicychestnut123:

miss-malaphor:

haiku-robot:

hermoninee-granger:

oniongentleman:

steftastan:

maverikloki:

penbrydd:

leonawriter:

everylineeverystory:

soggywarmpockets:

rnatthewgraygublers:

melancholicmarionette:

emmablackeru:

tassiekitty:

ranetree:

extravagantshoes:

cellostargalactica:

IT’S NOT ‘PEEKED’ MY INTEREST

OR ‘PEAKED’

BUT PIQUED

‘PIQUED MY INTEREST’

THIS HAS BEEN A CAPSLOCK PSA

THIS IS ACTUALLY REALLY USEFUL THANK YOU

ADDITIONALLY:

YOU ARE NOT ‘PHASED’. YOU ARE ‘FAZED.’

IF IT HAS BEEN A VERY LONG DAY, YOU ARE ‘WEARY’. IF SOMEONE IS ACTING IN A WAY THAT MAKES YOU SUSPICIOUS, YOU ARE ‘WARY’.

ALL IN ‘DUE’ TIME, NOT ‘DO’ TIME

‘PER SE’ NOT ‘PER SAY’

THANK YOU

BREATHE – THE VERB FORM IN PRESENT TENSE

BREATH – THE NOUN FORM

THEY ARE NOT INTERCHANGEABLE


WANDER – TO WALK ABOUT AIMLESSLY

WONDER – TO THINK OF IN A DREAMLIKE AND/OR WISTFUL MANNER


THEY ARE NOT INTERCHANGEABLE (but one’s mind can wander)

DEFIANT – RESISTANT
DEFINITE – CERTAIN

WANTON – DELIBERATE AND UNPROVOKED ACTION (ALSO AN ARCHAIC TERM FOR A PROMISCUOUS WOMAN)

WONTON – IT’S A DUMPLING THAT’S ALL IT IS IT’S A FUCKING DUMPLING

BAWL- TO SOB/CRY

BALL- A FUCKING BALL

YOU CANNOT “BALL” YOUR EYES OUT

AND FOR FUCK’S SAKE, IT’S NOT “SIKE”; IT’S “PSYCH”. AS IN “I PSYCHED YOU OUT”; BECAUSE YOU MOMENTARILY MADE SOMEONE BELIEVE SOMETHING THAT WASN’T TRUE.

THANK YOU.

*slams reblog*

IT’S ‘MIGHT AS WELL’. ‘MIND AS WELL’ DOES NOT MAKE GRAMMATICAL SENSE.

SLEIGHT – DEXTERITY, ARTIFICE, CRAFT (FROM ‘SLY’)
SLIGHT – VERY LITTLE, FRAIL, DELICATE

IT’S ‘SLEIGHT OF HAND’.

CAN I ADD TO THIS TOO?

IT’S NOT ‘COULD OF’, THAT DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE WHATSOEVER. IT’S ‘COULD HAVE’. SAME APPLIES TO ‘SHOULD HAVE’.

And this is why my students look at me as though I’m the devil when I try to tell them that no i’m not lying this really is a thing

IT’S ‘COULDN’T CARE LESS’ NOT ‘COULD CARE LESS’ IF YOU COULD CARE LESS THAT MEANS YOU CARE

it’s ‘couldn’t care less’ not
‘could care less’ if you could care
less that means you care

^Haiku^bot^0.4. Sometimes I do stupid things (but I have improved with syllables!). Beep-boop!

Please check out Homophones Weakly.

It’s a treasure trove.

And a goddamn delight.

I laughed so hard

charlesoberonn:

charlesoberonn:

charlesoberonn:

erinye:

charlesoberonn:

old-manrupee:

charlesoberonn:

danisstupid:

charlesoberonn:

New original 3D animated movie: Ducks.
The secret life of ducks when humans aren’t looking.

Whenever ducks fly south in the winter, they’re actually flying to a big city of ducks where they talk and have jobs and have traffic lights with pictures of ducks in them and every billboard and storefront is a bird pun.

A generic duck guy is a young adult who feels inadequate because his dad is a big broker in the bread stock exchange.

He accidentally reveals the secret life of ducks to a human child, and now he must take her south with him to duck city. On the way they get into hijinks and find out about a big duck conspiracy or something.

I was thinking at first this was an actual movie

It will be if you just give me 3 years and $150,000,000

How many times would “duck” be confused between the physical action and the animal in question?

12 times for comedic effect. 1 time used ironically in a sad moment in the end of act II. And 1 time in the last act when the protagonist has to say something badass when he defeats the bad guy.

image
image

This winter, ditch the binoculars and rediscover bird-watching with the hot new movie…….DUCK!!!! 

If this post gets 100,000 notes I’ll start working on the script.

Well then…

Let’s get to work.

Without further ado, and over a year in the making:

The final draft of the script