mbti-notes:

Both have dominant Fe, which means both have a nurturing mindset. They both want to maintain social harmony and iron out conflicts between people. They both want to help people with problems and care for people’s well-being. However, the methods or strategies they prefer to use will be different because of the middle functions.

Si-Ne: Because Sensing comes first, ESFJs focus more on the practical details of what people need. They take care of people’s physical and emotional needs by remembering people’s preferences or taking time to figure out how to make people feel more included or comfortable. They examine what you need right here and now and try to fulfill those needs as best as they can. Healthy ESFJs will utilize Ne to visualize different scenarios in terms of what types of problems people might run into, and then they can form better plans for getting around those problems or conflicts. For example, if a group of people have an activity planned, ESFJs will imagine what could go wrong or how people might feel uncomfortable and then plan accordingly. Unhealthy ESFJs will tend to use Ne unconsciously, imagining people’s motivations or intentions to be negative or even malicious, and then they will try to take control of the situation in ways that seem manipulative, clingy, or overbearing.

Ni-Se: Because Intuition comes first, ENFJs focus more on abstract generalizations. They care more about the bigger picture of human existence in terms of what people need in order to live (spiritually) happy and fulfilling lives in the long term. They are looking for fundamental truths about human nature that can be applied to help people be the best that they can be, often with a very heavy focus on strengthening the emotional bonds between people and promoting the development of more abstract principles like empathy, communication, and relationship building. They sometimes tend to overlook the practical details of what people need in the here and now, and focus more on conceptual ideals for the future. Healthy ENFJs will utilize Se to make practical plans to achieve their ideals for human or societal development. For example, if they believe that making the world more peaceful requires people to be more empathetic towards each other, they will use Se to find practical ways to achieve that goal, trying to adjust their plans to fit the experiences of the people they’re dealing with day to day. Unhealthy ENFJs will tend to use Se combatively or aggressively, trying to force their own ideals and methods onto others, creating an artificial sort of harmony that streamrolls people’s individual needs and preferences.

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